1х01
Simon: How could an adult human’ve been born in the mid-nineties?
Tanya: What more do you want from life?
Simon: Love. True love.
Tanya: Don’t be odd.
Simon: I’m very lonely.
Grandma: Oh, no you’re not, I thought you’d got a cat!
Simon: The cat didn’t make me any less lonely, it just became a mascot for my loneliness.
+++
Simon: Why are you telling me? Should I get an adult?
Simon: I read a book. If you visualize something like a healthy body, it comes to you. ... How healthy are you?
Grandpa: Well, that depends, I might have prostate cancer.
Simon: No. You’re healthy. Thinking makes it so.
1x02
Simon: We all gonna die, you know?
Liz: Simon! No, we're not!
Simon: No? Reaaly? I'm sure I saw it on a documentary once...
Liz: We've dicided so he doesn't get into any more trouble tnstead of him saying that word he's gotta say bagel now.
Simon: Well, that's racism solved, phew.
1x03
Simon: I don't know how to talk to humans.
Simon: That’s my type. I like the idea that I could go on a date with him and it could be his last date.
Simon: Ugh! Look at my big Jew face!
Adam: Your face is quite big.
Simon: Is it?
Adam: Yep.
Simon: Cause sometimes when I say that people say, "Oh, it's not so big."
Adam: Maybe it looks smaller because of the nose, but it's still pretty big.
Simon: Ok, you can do this. You're a person who can exist in real life.
Simon: Ben Theodore?! Welcome to my grandmother's house!
1x04
Tanya: What would you act in?
Simon: I dunno, like a cool indie film, with people wearing torn vests.
Tanya: What's wrong? You are upset about Sid dying?
Simon: No. More about your fiance living.
1x05
Simon: I'm very complicated. It's a terrible curse.
Tanya: Do you have any idea how much work has gone into getting a man to marry me?
Simon: No.
Tanya: I told Clive your father used to attack you with a cheese grater.
Simon: What? Why?
Tanya: You make up some bits so they feel they need to protect you and…
Simon: So you said he used to grate me?
Tanya: I thought kettle sounded a bit…
Simon: Yeah.
Tanya: Maybe I should have gone with spatula.
Simon: Yeah, spatula would have been good.
Liz: What’s he done now?
Tanya: Nothing for you to worry about, my son just has joined a cult, that’s all.
Liz: Typical, does he know we have plans today?
Grandma: What is it?
Simon: It’s not a cult, cults separate families, this is about bringing families together, making them talk.
Tanya: That’s worst.
1x06
Simon: I’m officially a claustrophobic narcissist, did I tell you?
Tanya: You’re not still doing that silly group therapy, are you?
Simon: Oh no, that one was awful, you had to listen to a lot of other people ridiculous problems.
Simon: “Hello Ben Theodore.”
Tanya: Why did you write his surname?
Simon: Cause it makes it formal, it’s funny.
Adam: Ben Theodor. I'm your #1 fan, can I touch your penis, please?
Simon: That's my next line.
Tanya: Do you want to sleep with him or be him?
Simon: Both. That's normal, isn't it?
Liz: Simon can go and get him on his cab!
Simon: Shut up, that cab is taking me to a place where people make sense.
Так всё по-клиффхангеровски закончилось. Хочу 2 сезон!
Grandma's House
1х01
Simon: How could an adult human’ve been born in the mid-nineties?
Tanya: What more do you want from life?
Simon: Love. True love.
Tanya: Don’t be odd.
Simon: I’m very lonely.
Grandma: Oh, no you’re not, I thought you’d got a cat!
Simon: The cat didn’t make me any less lonely, it just became a mascot for my loneliness.
+++
Так всё по-клиффхангеровски закончилось. Хочу 2 сезон!
Simon: How could an adult human’ve been born in the mid-nineties?
Tanya: What more do you want from life?
Simon: Love. True love.
Tanya: Don’t be odd.
Simon: I’m very lonely.
Grandma: Oh, no you’re not, I thought you’d got a cat!
Simon: The cat didn’t make me any less lonely, it just became a mascot for my loneliness.
+++
Так всё по-клиффхангеровски закончилось. Хочу 2 сезон!